Here I’ll sit…
I’m sitting here on the dock, it’s sunny and gorgeous and I’m going to stay here till the end of October. I’m writing this by hand, and when I have to go type it into the computer I’ll be annoyed because I won’t be able to read my own writing. But that’s OK now, because EVERYTHING is OK now.
I take that back. Everything is not OK. Everything is FANTASTIC.
Because it’s sunny and warm and gorgeous.
Why, exactly, am I living in a place where it’s grey and cold and miserable for many months? Late next fall, I must re-evaluate my whole life and living situation.
I’ll do it when I finally leave the dock.
Today I did some weight-lifting, then I washed and waxed my car, then I ran for 30 minutes. As I ran home, I thought, nwo I want to take a bike ride, and maybe go for a swim…but no, the lake is too chilly still, I suspect.
Actually, I have to confess something – as I ran, some motorcycles passed me. And I thought, “I’d love to go on a motorcycle ride.”
This is extraordinarily strange behavior for me; I’m generally fairly terrified of the entire motorcycle experience. You’re way too exposed, the possibility of crashing and the motorcycle spontaneously bursting into flames seems too likely to me.
I know this doesn’t happen, at least not all the time. The last time I was on a motorcycle, I felt like the helmet was squashing my head. And it was awfully…scary. I would have trusted the driver with my life (and I was!); I knew he wasn’t going to pop any wheelies or anything. But when the ride was over, I felt like I’d had a workout, from the sheer exertion of trying to will the driver not to tip over and crash all my bones under the bike.
That’s what makes it particularly odd, this sudden desire for a motorcycle ride. Maybe it’s because the cyclists that I saw were on the lake road, and they seemed to be having such a great, easygoing time. And also, I felt it would be nice to cruise along and enjoy the view without any physical exertion involved. Not that my run wasn’t fine, but it’d be nice to glide along on somebody else’s power.
Nobody’s called me, though, and asked if I’d like a motorcycle ride yet today, so I’m perfectly content to sit here on the dock, feeling the sun on my back.
Maybe if I sit here and meditate about a motorcycle ride, it will happen. Or better yet, if I sit here and let all thoughts slip out of my head, this crazy yearning for a ride will pass.
Because really, although the idea of the ride is appealing, I fear that the actuality might be fraught with peril.
If I get really ambitious, I could always ride my bike, coasting as much as possible.
A guy in a fishing boat just floated past. We had a nice chat. And a waverunner is buzzing across the water now. That’s what I’ll do – my brother just bought a new waverunner, and I’ll have to take it for a spin. I like waveruners because they’re the same idea as a motorcycle, except if you tip over (most people don’t, but I almost always do, sometimes just sitting there going nowhere), all you get is wet. And I could roar around like a maniac if I choose, or I could just putt putt putt around the lake in a leisurely fashion.
Luckily, David’s waverunner isn’t in the water yet, so I’ll continue to sit here enjoying the day. And when the waverunner does appear, I’ll be first in line, ready to climb aboard.
Spring, and life is mighty good.
Ok then,
Grace in love with warmth and sunshine