is a 10-minute shoulder massage.
ok, maybe 15.
my shoulders hurt.
i don’t think it’s too much to ask for. but i know it’s not going to happen.
today there were some good things. i went to best buy, and it looked like there was no line at all, which seemed a little odd since there were many cars in the parking lot (all the drivers driving like COMPLETE AND UTTER CRETINS, by the way). i got in line, though, and realized there was a gigantic master line that was then filtered into the individual checkstands.
there was a guy directing people to the available checkers.
i figured i’d be in line till well past dec. 25th, but i swear it only took two minutes. incredible. i got to the checkout and the guy was talking on a headset, saying stuff like “ok, #4, now #6, two on #1.” i realized he must be coordinating this entire effort WHILE AT THE SAME TIME he was checking me out. he was also gently prodding me to complete my transaction (“just enter your pin number there”), which he didn’t need to do, but i was just so mesmerized by his incredible multi-tasking. i mean, the guy was a model of efficiency and quickness, and i wonder if he’s paid anything even NEAR what he’s worth? I hope so. i doubt it.
i had a little heroin addiction-type problem today.
midday i had some free time, so i ran on the treadmill at the fit club west, which is great because they have individual tvs for every treadmill, so i could flip channels, which i used to love to do when i watched more tv than i do now (which is pretty much just “sex & the city,” usually only the one episode a night). but anyway, while running i gave myself a little lecture about how i was NOT going to eat lots and lots of food today, even though i knew i was going out to dinner. i kept thinking ONSTAGE IN UNDERWEAR. plus it seems that the past few days all i’ve done is eat.
i felt the speech went over quite well. i was attentive, i paid attention to myself even while flipping stations, i let the message soak into the core of my very being.
i left the club and went to work, still feeling all holier-than-thou and sure i was going to be buff in no time, maybe later in the day.
and there, sitting on the table in the back room at work was a HUGE BOX OF PEASE’S CHOCOLATES.
which is my heroin. i opened the box and ate two of them in succession, without even thinking twice about it. i actually thought about the speech i’d just given myself TWENTY MINUTES EARLIER, but i knew the speech was completely irrelevant because there was a BIG BOX OF CHOCOLATES in front of me.
my heroin.
the good thing about being a chocolate addict instead of a heroin addict is that i can give a perfectly good massage after eating a bunch of chocolates. my only point of reference about heroin addiction is from the movie “trainspotting,” which was bleak and depressing, and mostly i just remember everybody being all high and sprawled around all over the place as if they were all in comas, very unwashed and icky. it would be very dificult to give a good massage in this state. or do anything.
after eating all the chocolates today i met people for dinner, but i got there early because of the super-efficiency at best buy, so i sat in the bar and drank a glass of wine. i decided to splurge on an expensive glass of Sterling special cabernet, because i was pretty tired from all the massaging and exercising (plus i was coming down off my chocolate buzz), and i decided i deserved a treat.
plus i’ve been to the Sterling vineyard, and i thought that maybe sipping a delicious glass of Sterling wine would set into motion some good karma that might propel me back to the beautiful napa valley sometime in the not-too-distant future. a girl can dream, can’t she?
the wine was only mediocre. it should have been delicious.
oh well. at least i didn’t have my hopes up unrealistically, which will always get me into trouble. it was only a glass of wine, after all. not anything profound.
and there’s always tomorrow to quit eating altogether.
except randy is having a party. i’m baking some french bread for it, but i can resist the bread because iv’e made it many many many times, and it doesn’t hold so much allure for me.
but randy went out and bought a CHOCOLATE FOUNTAIN for the party.
hopeless, it’s just hopeless.
but at least i realize this now. so i don’t have to feel all bad this time tomorrow night.
xmas is coming right up, by the way. shopping done? gifts wrapped? i, personally, have to buy some presents. must get right on that. time’s a wastin’.
but not right now.
tomorrow. whoops, no time tomorrow.
thursday? busy on thursday.
friday?
saturday is too late. definitely.
ok then,
grace approaching xmas.