Well, there have to be good things about Sunday. Sunday, especially Sunday night, has traditionally been a low point for me, dating back to when I was in junior high school (where everything started to go wrong in my life) and I dreaded the thought of getting up and going to Franklin Middle School yet again. This was only two short years in my life, but they were very formative (as well as pudgy, ugly, stringy greasy hair braces ugly glasses lots of acne) years, to be sure.<\/p>\n
So, yesterday, Sunday, I tried to think up something positive about the day.<\/p>\n
And when I was driving home last night, on Toronto Road, between Taco Bell and the 4-way stop that leads to Lincoln Land, over in that new subdivision I saw a HUGE BUNNY.<\/p>\n
Easter, that is. A blow-up bunny, like the millions of blow-up Santas and snowmen and stuff you see at Christmas. The Easter Bunny is pink, and nicely lighted, and as I was driving I looked over at the subdivision and there was the huge bunny, warm and appealing and it made me feel good, just knowing of the existence of the enormous pink bunny. Part of the appeal is that you don\u2019t see them everywhere, like the omnipresent Santas and snowmen.<\/p>\n
Not the best Sunday I\u2019ve ever had, but the giant bunny gave me hope. I realize this may be stretching things a bit, but just the fact that I could get a moment\u2019s happiness at the sight of the great big bunny says that all is not lost.<\/p>\n
I spent some time at Panera yesterday afternoon, free wifi, and while sitting there for a good long time, I kept smelling the smells and so ate dinner at the other Panera . Also a very good thing.<\/p>\n
Uh, other positive things\u2026is that it? Just the two? Eating at Panera and a giant pink Easter Bunny?<\/p>\n
Surely, surely there must be something\u2026<\/p>\n
Oh yeah, I printed out a bunch of copies of my latest \u201cgraceuncensored\u201d column, and I\u2019m going to take them around to some different places on Tuesday. I did a few of these in the fall, but then things happened, I got kind of bummed out, and quit doing it for a while. But, MARCH FORTH, I\u2019m all about that (I wrote about Marching Forth a few entries ago, I believe), so here I go, making a fresh start, my plan is to do one EVERY TWO WEEKS.<\/p>\n
So please, if you live here in Spfld, tell you friends who can\u2019t read me online, who don\u2019t have computers because theirs got struck by lightening (like happened to my friend Randy), to go pick up their paper copy of my column. Tomorrow I\u2019m going to take them to Recycled Records, the Cardologist, Food Fantasies, and the Wienerdog. I might take them a few more places, but it seems daunting enough to take them around to these four. Writing, I could sit here and write all day, but going out and distributing things, that\u2019s another matter entirely. I don\u2019t know why, it\u2019s just the way I am, I can\u2019t help it. But at least I do manage to go ahead and do it, even though it fills me with dread.<\/p>\n
Why dread, anyway, for god\u2019s sake? It\u2019s not like they\u2019re going to say, NO GRACE, WE DON\u2019T WANT YOUR COLUMN, YOU CAN\u2019T PUT IT UP HERE. It\u2019s just me being me, the evil voice in my head that doesn\u2019t think anything will ever go right ever again. But at the same time, I\u2019m CONQUERING THAT FEAR. Because I\u2019m all about that. <\/p>\n
What I really need is a marketing guru or something. Somebody who could give me ideas on how to branch out, and, better yet, how to start making actual money with the writing.<\/p>\n
Actually, my friend Thad is the head of online marketing at Gannet Publishing, the huge huge Fortune 500 conglomerate that owns papers like the Chicago Tribune and pretty much almost everything. But whenever he\u2019s given me ideas for ways to market myself, he starts rattling stuff off like\u2026getting people to buy ads on the newsletter and on the online column, and branching the online version out so I have OTHER writers, and expanding and doing all kinds of stuff\u2026and my reaction is always to start humming a little song in my head as he goes on and on, as I just can\u2019t bear the thought of all the information. <\/p>\n
What I really need is somebody who just wants to DO all that kind of stuff for me. <\/p>\n
Don\u2019t we all? Yep, we all need somebody to do all the stuff we don\u2019t want to do in life. <\/p>\n
One thing about Thad\u2019s overwhelming ideas is that I don\u2019t WANT any other writers on my site, because it\u2019s GRACEUNCENSORED, not grace plus others uncensored. Let them get their own sites. I just read something about how \u201cwe\u2019re all, tragically, stuck inside our own heads.\u201d And the site is my way of getting the stuff in my head out into the world. It\u2019s absolutely right, that thing about being stuck inside our own heads. Somebody told me that I\u2019m living in my own little world, which annoyed me, because that\u2019s what we\u2019re ALL doing, aren\u2019t we? Yes, we are. It\u2019s not just me.<\/p>\n
I just saw the \u201cParade\u201d section of Sunday\u2019s paper; I never read Parade because I hate it. But on the cover it said \u201cWhat people earn.\u201d Only I glanced at it quickly and thought it said \u201cWhat people EAT.\u201d Which amused me, and I thought it\u2019d be much more entertaining. Because mostly it seems like reading all these different jobs people have and how much money they make can make a person all bummed out. Sure, maybe it\u2019s nice to know that I\u2019m making more money than a woman who\u2019s a martial arts teacher in Ann Arbor, Michigan, but I know that she\u2019s either (a) living in a cardboard box somewhere, or (b) has a husband who is supplying her with plenty of money so she doesn\u2019t have to inhabit a box.<\/p>\n
Most of the people, though, are Condoleeza Rice, who makes $180,000, or John Travolta, who made $25 million last year. It\u2019s slightly depressing realizing that SpongeBob Squarepants made $1.5 billion dollars last year, almost a billion and a half more dollars than I made.<\/p>\n
But also, money isn\u2019t everything, which is why it would be more interesting to read that a females professional skier in Alaska eats nothing but hot dogs and cheese whiz all winter long, or that a horror writer in Berkeley, CA (who also made less than me, and I\u2019m sure he must live at home with his parents judging by his photo) treats himself to a lovely dinner at Alice Waters\u2019 Chez Panisse once a month.<\/p>\n
Me, so far today (right now it\u2019s 4:32 p.m.), I\u2019ve had a bowl of Grape Nuts, one half of a Mel-O-Cream cream filled doughnut, and a cup of hot chocolate. I realize I\u2019m lacking my 5-8 servings of fruits and vegetables so far, but I\u2019ll make it up at dinner. All I\u2019m saying is, most people are all about the food, and it would make you feel you had a connection with Condoleeza Rice if you knew that she loved Captain Crunch for breakfast, as opposed to feeling resentful that she makes so much money (but not anywhere near as much as SpongeBob SP).<\/p>\n
I started writing a journal when I was about 10, only then it was my diary, and it had a little bitty lock on it. And that\u2019s pretty much all that was in it, what I had for dinner. I know I must have been filling up my time with more than eating dinner; I did read a lot, and watched TV, went to school, blah blah blah. Clearly, things must have been a little dull back then, though, but then again, it\u2019s not like I could drive anywhere and do exciting things. Not like now, when I could get in my car and drive to\u2026well, Walgreens, for one thing. How many Walgreens does a town need, anyway? Plus all the other drug stores \u2013 who\u2019s buying all the drugs? Plus all the other tons and tons of crap they sell there. And why are there drugstores RIGHT NEXT TO other drug stores? I believe I\u2019ve mentioned this before, but it continues to baffle me that they put up a great big CVS Pharmacy on the corner of Stevenson Drive and West Lake Drive, and RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET they built a Walgreens. I mean, I doubt they\u2019re going to completely run out of Cadbury Cream Eggs at CVS, but it is comforting to know that if they do, I could get them at Walgreens. But this hardly seems justification for building an entire STORE.<\/p>\n
There must be a big corporate drug store plan in all this; I bet Thad would know why they do it, and I bet it makes perfect marketing sense, and that\u2019s why Walgreens is a big rich company and I\u2019m not.<\/p>\n
Anyway, like I said, please tell everybody you know to go pick up copies of my column tomorrow. I just want people to read it, that\u2019s all. Spreading the word of Grace.<\/p>\n
Ok then,<\/p>\n
Grace with a whole lot on my mind.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Well, there have to be good things about Sunday. Sunday, especially Sunday night, has traditionally been a low point for me, dating back to when I was in junior high school (where everything started to go wrong in my life) and I dreaded the thought of getting up and going to Franklin Middle School yet […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_hide_featured_image":false,"_jetpack_featured_image_duplicate_dismissed":0,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-105","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6JLYy-1H","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/graceuncensored.com\/WordPress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/105","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/graceuncensored.com\/WordPress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/graceuncensored.com\/WordPress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/graceuncensored.com\/WordPress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/graceuncensored.com\/WordPress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=105"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/graceuncensored.com\/WordPress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/105\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/graceuncensored.com\/WordPress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=105"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/graceuncensored.com\/WordPress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=105"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/graceuncensored.com\/WordPress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=105"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}