GRACE UNCENSORED

Feb. 28, 2006

and finally, tuesday night... [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 11:20 pm

whew. i’m not excited about moving right now. even though, allegedly, in just TWO DAYS i’ll finally finally have high-speed internet access.

but this whole moving thing is a big drag. i’m trying to organize things here and i have to keep cleaning and i realize how really really bad i am about cleaning and this is like doing a whole bunch of cleaning, plus of course because i don’t have boxes yet i’m just stacking things all around and it’s getting a little difficult to walk around with ease.

maybe tomorrow, boxes?

i have too many things. i have two huge piles of things to get rid of but they’re completely dwarfed by the stuff i’m keeping. TOO MUCH STUFF.

moving is a great way to evaluate just how much stuff a person has. TOO MUCH.

whew.

that is all for right now.

ok then,

very very tired grace.

boxes, shower curtain rod, plus more [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 3:49 pm

christine e-mailed me saying that i have to look under the sub-category “window treatments” after i look at “home decor” on overstock.com. but i’m totally bored with that now anyway. i’m just going to go out and FIND SOMETHING tonight after work. two people now, randy and q. (quigbert) told me to LOOK AT PENNEY’S, so i’ll try that.

i bought a shower curtain rod today. VERY VERY EXCITING.

and more importantly I SIGNED THE LEASE.

somebody said it’d take a couple of weeks to get the cable access, but they’re doing it on THURSDAY. how’s that for fast? now i just have to buy a modem tonight.

and window things.

and oh yeah, I NEED BOXES. randy, who is very generous and thoughtful ALL THE TIME, said he’d get me some boxes on friday at work.

maybe i won’t have to get any boxes of my own. i was thinking i could take the boxes of stuff i have over to my place and then unload them and then bring them back and fill them up again.

this is the lazy way to make more work for myself, isn’t it?

maybe i’ll stop by barnes and noble on my way home. but i think erica said that brad, MAN WITH BOXES, only works till five. i could call, but i already called the electric company and the gas company and the garbage collectors and the cable company and there’s only SO MUCH CALLING I CAN DO IN ONE AFTERNOON.

i don’t work in an office so i don’t have to call people or answer the phone.

i also hate meetings.

next month we’re having a meeting here where i do massage, except we get to go to little saigon. so a lunch meeting can’t be that bad.

maybe they’ll be serving alcohol by then.

ok then,

tuesday afternoon grace.

tuesday right b4 noon... [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 11:46 am

here’s a great site that christine told me about: overstock.com. she told me to look for curtains there, but their curtains seem to cost as much as the ones at target, but i only looked at about three of the 198 pages of stuff they had under the “home decor” category and i quickly got bored. but it seems that they have MANY MANY cool things there, all kinds of stuff, so you should check it out, especially if you like buying things.

in addition to home stuff, they have electronics, sporting goods, clothes, all kinds of stuff stuff stuff.

so jump right in.

that is my only FABULOUS TIP for right now.

perhaps i’ll write more later. note to randy: if i don’t write anymore today, it’s not because i’ve SUDDENLY FALLEN OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH.

i’m just very very BUSY.

gotta find some boxes.

christine pointed out that since i’m just moving across town for a change instead of my usual monumental moving across the country, i could just throw stuff in my car.

ok then,

tuesday grace.

tuesday morning [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 8:44 am

i’m starting to feel lots of PRESSURE from randy, because last night he said to me “i kept checking your website and you didn’t write AT ALL.” whew, i need to be much more vigilant...but on the other hand, i was VERY VERY BUSY.

and am going to be much more so.

first, i’m definitely moving. perhaps tomorrow. this seems pretty quick and i’m slightly freaked out because right now i don’t even have any boxes to put stuff into. i need a few boxes. more than three.

erica told me to call barnes & noble because they have lots of boxes, which makes sense. she used to work there and knows people there and told me to call and ask for some guy named brad.

erica and i had dinner at the new vietnamese restaurant last night, little saigon, and i love that place. then, for true excitement, we went to target. i looked at curtains, because my new place has nine big windows and no window coverings at all. curtains are kind of pricey, especially at target. i’m going to look some other places today.

but first i need to sign the lease, to make it actually real and official.

many things to do today.

must get boxes.

also, last night i booked my FLIGHT TO LA! i’m leaving march 20th and i’ll be gone for 12 days and i’m quite excited about this, too. jerri called me on sunday afternoon to tell me that they’re going to NYC again, and do i want to stay at their place still and i said YES I DO!

tickets to LA right now are very cheap.

there are many things i want to do and see there.

so right now i have to confess that i have the painfully slow dial-up to access the internet. when i get my new place, though, i’ll be truly wireless and high speed and i’m going to spend the entire summer sitting on the porch writing and hanging out. except for when i have to go work, but mostly i’ll be sitting on my porch.

i don’t think i’ve told you about my great entrepreneurial plan, have i? i’ll be on a pretty well-trafficked street, so i’m going to have a lemonade stand, and i’ll also sell chocolate chip cookies. i think i could make quite a tidy profit.

yeah, i’m always thinking about ways to get even more wealthy.

actually, one summer during high school i did have a cookie stand, at the farmer’s market downtown. my boyfriend chris and i made dozens and dozens of cookies - chocolate chip, oatmeal, and peanut butter - and sold them out of the back of my yellow volkswagon rabbit. i remember that it was a whole lot of fun. i can’t say if we made any kind of profit at all then because at the time i was even worse about making money than i am now. chris got me a great deal on a display-model Cuisinart mixer and i used it for all those cookies and i still have that mixer so many years later. i need to be a cuisinart spokesperson i think, because it’s the best mixer made. i mean, i’ve dropped the thing on the floor more than once, because i’ve walked away when mixing bread dough, and yet it still keeps right on chugging away.

try not to drop your mixer on the floor, though, because it’s very very heavy and not so good for the floor.

that’s all my words of wisdom for tuesday morning. i must get out of bed because TIME’S A WASTIN'! and i have many many things ahead of me today, plus tomorrow, etc etc etc.

ok then,

tuesday morning grace.

(ironically, that’s where i’ll be headed today, to the store tuesday morning. a fairly dumb name for a store, isn’t it?)

Feb. 26, 2006

why i’m a very bad person. by grace smith. [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 10:23 am

here’s me at randy’s before the gala:

me.

but don’t let this glamour photo lure you into thinking that i’m all glamorous and good...because i’m VERY VERY BAD.

i have no photo of me after the gala, so i’ll have to describe me for you - big huge white t-shirt of randy’s,and over that a giant comfy sweatshirt. plus these red plaid soft and big pajama bottoms, and gym socks. i needed to be warm to play boggle, and it payed off because i SLAUGHTERED them!

but here’s the really bad part - there was a small box of pease’s valentine chocolates on the counter in the kitchen, and i opened it and ate one. and then when we were playing i ate another one and brought the box to the table and randy said THOSE VALENTINES ARE FOR BEV!

I was horrified. HORRIFIED. but it’s WAY PAST VALENTINE’S DAY, i said. I HAVEN’T GIVEN THEM TO HER YET! cried randy.

and then of course it was too late.

SUCH a bad bad person. but at least i got to eat a few more chocolates. they were delicious.

and as we played i kept laughing about what a very very horrible person i am, eating somebody else’s chocolates. i told randy i’d bake bev some cookies.

so bev, if you happen to be reading this (AND I HOPE SHE’S NOT!), i’m very very sorry and i’ll make it up to you. cookies, homemade bread, whatever you want, i’ll make it for you.

the gala benefit ballet thing was quite fun. the ballerinas performed a few numbers after we had a delicious dinner, and they were really good and samuel chester who was featured in a few of them is such a good dancer, and it was interesting to be in the small dance room because we were so close to them and could see how much panting they were doing because it’s SUCH HARD WORK. samuel chester didn’t wear a shirt in one of the numbers, where he was supposed to be a pirate, and that was a good idea, i thought, having him shirtless. you could see the very highly defined muscles in his chest and abs and i thought maybe HE should be my new boyfriend. but he’s too young and he lives in another state. but man, when he kept doing turn after turn after turn he was just so good...

abby eddy played the cello with some other guy before dinner. she always seems to be everywhere, and then afterwards she slung her cello on her back to leave. i told her what a good job she did.

i was glad i wore my gold dress because almost everybody else wore black. now, i’ve mentioned a time when i went to a super-fancy reception and everybody else was wearing black, but at that tie i wore something totally inappropriate. the gold dress was fine plus not so boring as black black black.

today is MOM’S BIRTHDAY. so we’re going to do many birthday things today.

happy birthday, mom. please tell her so if you see her.

ok then,

sunday grace.

Feb. 25, 2006

last night, tonight, and right this very minute. plus my new boyfriend. [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 2:31 pm

i’m sitting at amy’s salon yet again waiting to get my hair done. she may do it at 2:30 or 2:45 but it might be later than that but that is totally fine with me, i’m happy to just sit here. i’ve quit eating little chocolates (i think i had about 90), and i’m contemplating some caffeine.

she’s doing my hair unexpectedly. she didn’t have time, but called me and said she found time, and so now i’m going to be very fancy. that’s the good thing. the bad thing is that i won’t be able to nap after my hair is fancy. but that’s ok. caffeine.

because last night i stayed up later than i thought i would. i went to the hilton and heard this guy named roger wallace and you can check him out at roger wallace, although i haven’t actually looked at the website. he’s from austin texas and he’s very cute and as he played i told my friend jill that i would like roger wallace to be my new boyfriend. except he seemed perhaps a little young. but you never know. he was a great entertainer and had a cute smile.

but then i didn’t actually speak to him during his very very long break, so maybe roger wallace won’t be my new boyfriend after all.

there were quite a few people at the performance, but there should have been more because the music was so good. i knew a few people there which always surprises me plus there was a sort of creepy guy in a black leather cap who sidled up to the bar where i was sitting and said “how’s it going, grace?” and he just looked awfully weird and so i said “do i know you?” and then he said he’d read my column, blah blah blah, and i think he kept talking a bit, but when i turned to listen to the band he slunk away and stood at the end of the bar staring at me with his big creepy eyes.

luckily he left before i did.

i kept meaning to leave, but then i stayed for one more song...and one more song...and one more song.

there were signs in the lobby that illinois wineries were going to be meeting there today, and i thought it might be interesting to have som illinois wine although generally it seems to be kind of overly sweet and a little weak. but still.

i wish i’d slept more. i tried to nap for 20 minutes but the minute my eyes closed my mind started whirring.

oh well. caffeine.

tonight i’m going to the BALLET BENEFIT GALA. i’m wearing my long gold glittery dress with matching shoes plus i have a perfect matching bag that i don’t think i’ve ever even used.

but so that’s why i’m going to have fancy hair.

very fancy.

fancy yet sleepy.

maybe i’ll doze here at the salon now because it’s very comfy, except amy is having a conversation with her client and i guess it would be rude to tell them to please shut up because i’m trying to sleep.

ok then,

saturday grace.

Feb. 24, 2006

hmm, on friday morning [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 9:14 am

really really weird dream last night. i won’t bore you with what it was about because i know that when people tell me their dreams and they go on and on and sometimes they’re only interesting to the person who had the dream...but i’ve been having odd dreams a few nights in a row now.

and usually i just dream about ironing. or vacuuming. or more often, i simply don’t remember my dreams at all.

so hmm, about that.

happy friday.

ok then,

grace

well.... [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 12:33 am

ups. downs. this. that.

my cat is fast asleep on my bed, very very happy right now to just be asleep on my bed.

i need to think more in those terms.

i’m probably not going to be moving into the place with the porch after all. my entire family seems to think i’ll be robbed and terrorized if i move there. this makes me sad. all i want is a porch.

plus i was really hoping to move next week. but now maybe that won’t happen either.

i guess i won’t get all stressed out about it. because i need to sleep, instead.

plus tomorow is friday. so there’s that.

ok then,

february grace.

Feb. 22, 2006

hmmmm.... [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 11:33 pm

where, exactly, did wednesday go?

where?

i was thinking i’d written on here today, but i haven’t.

where was i?

eating red meat, that’s where.

will i never end?

tonight, a vietnamese beef dish at the great new vietnamese restaurant, i think it’s called “little saigon,” it’s on wabash, there was something about it in the paper which i didn’t actually read but luckily randy did and he and i and amy and jim went there and it was quite delicious PLUS it was actually decorated nicely, which seems way too rare here in spfld illinois, home of lincoln who might have been ok with the very plain restaurants everywhere and he probably wouldn’t have even noticed the decor anyway.

i think it’s safe to say that abraham l. wasn’t as shallow as me, grace s.

yesterday it was the perfect cheeseburger at maldaner’s for lunch, the day before, steak at ned kelly’s.

tomorrow, NO RED MEAT.

perhaps i’ll be a vegetarian for the day.

doubtful. highly doubtful.

tonight i’ve been throwing stuff away from my bathroom drawers. how many little bottles of lotion does one person need? probably not as many as i have. but i kept thinking BUT I’LL USE THESE SOMEDAY. i had a big debate today with a rather argumentative fellow who insisted he wouldn’t use lotion because he’d then have to use it ALL THE TIME and it would be just ONE MORE THING. but it’s not like he has to shave his legs, for god’s sake, nothing vast and annoying like that every day. i tried to tell him that the lotion would make his skin less dry and he probably wouldn’t have to use it in the summer because of all the humidity but HE’D HAVE NONE OF IT.

it always amuses me quite a bit when guys have these different ideas about things. it’s always something different, but i can’t think of a guy i’ve ever known who hasn’t had some odd idea about something simple and obvious like lotion. i mean, not lotion per se of course, but just some little thing that they have completely wrong and refuse to listen to reason.

but that’s ok. guys can be ok. once in a while, anyway. sometimes. not NEVER. not most not never, anyway.

i did manage to throw away quite a bunch of stuff from my cabinets and drawers, including most but not all of my outdated prescription drugs.

i think i’m going to be moving. maybe next week. i’m pretty excited about it, but also fairly overwhelmed because i have TOO MUCH STUFF. i think most people have too much stuff, WAY too much stuff, but if you don’t move, chances are you won’t get rid of it. i realize there must be a few people out there who aren’t pack rats, but i’ve never met any of them personally.

getting rid of stuff is good. REALLY good.

but not so easy to do.

i maybe be moving into a place with a big porch. this excites me more than i can say at this time.

not to mention the fact that spring is RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER.

life. good.

pretty much.

all in all.

not entirely, but that’s too much to ask for, isn’t it?

isn’t it?

i think about sleep now. not that i’ll actually get around to it for a while.

ok then,

grace later than i thought it was.

LATE on tuesday [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 12:30 am

and tomorrow is wednesday already, isn’t it? whew.

today i had a PERFECT cheeseburger for lunch at maldaner’s. it was quite exciting to sit in the bar there, since it’s now ALL SMOKE-FREE. i’m really looking forward to all bars & restaurants being smoke-free in september. oh, and bowling alleys. not that i do too much bowling, but maybe i’ll start going a lot in the fall.

the nice thing about bowling is that even though i of course TOTALLY SUCK at it, there are plenty of people who are also bad. also, it’s not possible to do too many really retarded things when bowling, except one time i did try to throw the ball and instead it bounced backwards and rolled onto the carpeted part of the bowling alley where people were getting drinks.

but that was a LONG time ago.

also, how difficult can a sport be where people are drinking while doing it?

bowling, i’m going to be all over it.

my mom’s birthday is sunday. maybe i’ll buy her some earplugs, since i feel they’re really the best thing ever.

total sound deprivation, it’s FANTASTIC.

pretty total, anyway. i can still sort of hear the sound of my wave machine which also muffles other sounds.

goodnight. goodnight.

gs

Feb. 21, 2006

tuesday tuesday tuesday [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 11:51 am

i’m at the library now; i had a little free time b4 going to lunch, and when i walked in, there was my friend Kurt, standing around with a great big camera with a great big lens around his neck. i asked him to take my picture, of course,and then i chastised him for not coming to the play and then he chastised me because i went to coz’s pizza the other night without him and we made tentative plans to go out and have a beer real soon this week (but only in theory since of course i hate the beer but some wine or perhaps a margarita or two would be fine).

so now i’m typing at this computer and the space key keep sticking and i always feel like i need to spray the keyboards with disinfectant here at the library. there’s a crazy woman sitting next to me or at least she appears to be crazy because she keeps leaning way over to look at what i’m doing plus she keeps humming random things. but then again maybe she’s perfectly sane because i find myself humming and sometimes even singing to myself in public and so maybe people think i, too,am crazy.

today i’m sure somebody said something very profound to me but now i forget what it was.

it probably would have change my life.

oh well.

ok then,

tuesday morning grace.

i survived monday, and hopefully you did too... [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 12:22 am

despite the bitter cold. at least you didn’t go to work with GOBS OF WAXY GLUE in your hair.

i put more solution on it this morning and left it in for twenty minutes and washed it three times...and it was just gross. it looked like it was greasy and flat.

i bought more remover, though, at this asian black beauty supply place on taylor and south grand. it was interesting in there because it was just me and a whole bunch of black guys who were all on their cell phones. what exactly were they buying at the beauty supply place?

the asian woman who is the owner explained that i should buy a different kind of hair extensions next time, one that won’t be SO DAMAGING to my scalp and hair. huh. nobody told me these were damaging. she showed me some better extensions. they were blue. hmm.

i used a whole bottle of remover solution this afternoon, and now the glue is about 80% gone, except for some gummy sticky places randomly scattered throughout.

hey, i forgot to mention, i got a MARRIAGE PROPOSAL today. very exciting, especially because the only proposals i ever get are from old farmers at the hospital.

this was from my friend brad who came to see the show over the weekend but didn’t bother to stick around afterwards to say hi. but he sent me a nice e-mail, telling me he wished i’d prepared him for my outfit, so clearly he isn’t reading this website at all. and then he had two questions - do i own the lingerie myself? and would i marry him?

very nice. yes, and no.

my plan is that one of these farmers is going to be young and cute instead of old and wrinkly, and then when he asks i’ll say HELL YES I’LL MARRY YOU! because it might be kind of fun to be a farmer’s wife.

although it might be incredibly boring and lonely and depressing, on the other hand.

i guess i’ll have to wait and see.

i saw the movie “walk the line” tonight even though i wasn’t that interested in seeing it and it was FANTASTIC. i highly recommend it.

i think i’ve now eaten most of the valentine’s candy that’s been lying around here, always calling to me. whew, glad that’s done. what a lot of work.

ok, on we go through the week, knowing that every day is one day closer to WARM WEATHER...

i’m still thinking of sneaking off to someplace warm for a couple of days. when i have some free time.

goodnight goodnight goodnight,

monday grace, a good day because i didn’t smack into anything at all for the whole entire day. but my shin is still throbbing a little from hitting it good and hard against a sharp object at linda’s party last friday.

Feb. 19, 2006

glue crisis [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 10:48 pm

i mean, why does there have to be a crisis of any kind on a sunday night after a pretty darn exhausting weekend?

i got home and put away the vast majority of my stuff from the show and i decided to take out the hair extensions because one was severely coming out anyway. so i took them out and it wasn’t horrible but also not great especially when i got some remover in my eye, and the stuff smells suspiciously like paint thinner.

not so good for the eyes.

then i had to wash my hair and realized that gobs and gobs of glue had not come out. i kept washing and washing it but to no avail.

so now my scalp feels sort of like it’s covered with gummy wax.

not so great.

i’m going to try putting more remover on my hair in the morning, and then washing it again...but i have a suspicion that i’m going to go around with gummy hair for the next week.

not to mention how short it feels after the long luxurious hair extensions.

oh well.

at least thinking about the wax in my hair is directing my attention away from the general melancholy feeling i have about the play being over.

it went well today, despite a small crowd, but there were 101 people, which really wasn’t bad for a sunday afternoon.

whew. monday, not looking forward to it so much.

ok then,

sunday night, not ever such a good time but especially not at the moment, grace.

one more time... [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 10:23 am

cast photo

There it is. i hope you come to the show this afternoon, because this is your last chance.

when i sat down to write this morning i had no recollection of writing that entry last night at two in the morning.

the cast party was a lot of fun, by the way. the italian beef was delicious. jim and georgia have a nice house that felt cozy and i kind of wanted to move in. plus they have two dogs and at least a couple of cats. the cats kept slinking around and georgia said one of them is usually never around when strangers are in the house, but the smell of the sardines was too much for her (him?).

one more show. it seems really weird.

ok then,

sunday grace.

late late late [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 2:02 am

1:59 a.m. when i’m starting to write this, as a matter of fact.

it’s probably about eight below right now.

the show tonight...FANTASTIC. 224 people in attendance, people who laughed a LOT. it was really good.

the party, also very fun.

but the bitterly cold ride home...not so pleasant. i’m very happy to be in my very warm bed right now.

i’m trying not to think about doing a matinee tomorrow at two. gee, in exactly TWELVE HOURS. slightly difficult to fathom.

there was a nice array of sardines at the party tonight. delicious.

ok then, good night,

overly tired (a new thing?) grace.

Feb. 18, 2006

JOSHUA RATZ, RANDY DUNHAM, KYNDA, PLUS MORE NAMES... [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 3:54 pm

first of all, i wrote a while ago about how randy finally got a new computer after his was hit by lightning and now he’s online a lot but he was dismayed when he googled himself and there were NO LISTINGS at all. so i’m just testing this to see if I write out his full name, Randy Dunham, that he will make it to Google and will no longer complain about the great injustice of being google-less. Randy Dunham Randy Dunham Randy Dunham.

Kynda is a woman who takes lovely photos and i have a link to her site over there on the right side of the screen, and last night i actually met her in person at my show, which was neat.

the show last night was FANTASTIC, because the audience was SPECTACULAR as well as TERRIFIC, plus there were quite a few of them. 152 to be exact, which is the biggest crowd we’ve had. this isn’t huge, but it’s gratifying that it was more than last week. they laughed a LOT, more times than they ever have, and they applauded a lot and it was really fun and i HOPE you make it to the show because there are only TWO MORE PERFORMANCES, tonight at eight and tomorrow at two. Hoogland Center for the Arts.

my friend ann (ANN BOVA) saw the show last night and afterwards she told me that she laughed so much that she washed all her makeup off. Patrick (PATRICK RUSSELL) said a friend of his laughed so much that her stomach hurt. i don’t know his friend’s name, except he had friends there named Ginger and Tasha and Fifi and Suzette and Luscious Lola and Trixie and he claims they’re not strippers or even exotic dancers and so i believe him even though i did see some audience members wearing even less clothes than me.

we have quite a few tickets pre-sold for tonight and hopefully this NIGHTMARISHLY COLD weather won’t deter others from coming out to see it.

i had to go outside a couple of times today and this morning my car didn’t particularly want to start and i couldn’t figure out why but of course it’s because it was ZERO when i went out.

yeah. zero.

damn.

damnitall.

up there in the title i also mention JOSHUA RATZ, and this is because he’s (allegedly) going to be coming to the show tonight, because his brother MATT RATZ is in the show along with matt’s fiancee BRIDGET O'BRIEN. i have been accused on more than one occasion of having a crush on joshua ratz, but that’s not really true. i DID see him two and a half times in “jekyll & hyde” at the theater center (performing on the very same stage where i’ve been lately) and he was really brilliant in the role and i don’t know when i’ve seen a finer performance.

but it’s not like i want to MARRY him or anything. he just happens to be very talented, that’s all. in real life he’s probably a scurrilous scoundrel and an impudent villian. because most men are when you really get to know them.

last night the cast party at linda’s was fun. except for the lack of meat. by the time the show was over i was ravenous for a change and wanted a juicy cheeseburger. i realized nobody would bring cheeseburgers to the party, but i was really hoping for something more substantial than the cookies, vegetables and chips that were offered. finally, FINALLY troy (TROY THOMAS PFAFFEE) showed up with his lovely wife Shirene (SHIRENE THOMAS) and an electric skillet full of bite-sized fried chicken pieces which were pretty darn delicious, especially covered with a little cheese sauce which luckily somebody else had brought. not cheeseburgers, but it helped satisfy my meat craving.

i don’t know how amy and jim manage to be vegetarians each and every day, day in and day out, year after year. i don’t eat lots of meat, but occasionally it’s really necessary.

anyway, besides the food, the party was fun. this guy named John who does our sound and i feel bad that i don’t even know his last name but i do feel good that at least i know his first name because generally i can’t even manage that with people unless i really focus on remembering it, but john closely pays attention when i smack my head against the window and then fall over the couch. he gives me honest criticism of the fall and he agreed with me that last night was the WORST EVER. other people don’t notice so much, but last night i don’t think i got very close to the window and then i ran in and stopped and then said my line and then just sort of dove over the couch and it was very VERY lame. i promised him that tonight would be really good, but i hope he doesn’t have his hopes up too much.

tonight i’m anticipating the ITALIAN BEEF that jim (JIM HEPWORTH) will be serving at his cast party. i’m making some french bread to take to the party and actually i should stop writing here because it’s been rising for a very long time and i’m sure i need to punch it down again.

i stayed up rather late last night, not entirely certain when i went to sleep, all i know is that i decided to nap about an hour and a half ago and just got up. and i could have slept a little more.

but instead i’m going to punch down the bread and then maybe i’ll have some caffeine.

as you can see, i’m having a dramatically fascinating saturday.

the next two saturdays i have to give massages which i usually don’t do but the people were all in desperate need and i might as well do it. so i’ll have to get up early SIX DAYS IN A ROW starting on monday. ok, yeah, i don’t really have to get up that early on any given day, but the thought of not having to get up at any specific time is always appealing to me. LAzY, i can’t help it. and don’t particularly want to.

randy was delighted today to realize that he doesn’t have to work monday, because then he gets to watch martha stewart because her show is going to be about springfield, and she took a friend to the presidential museum. hmm, if that’s true why didn’t we hear about her being here? maybe we did but i missed it. i’ve been known to do that, miss big HUGE IMPORTANT news stories like that.

like missing most of the olympics. i did see some of the mens figure skating the other night and i have to say that yeah, they’re very very gay, but even more than that some of them actually looked like women, but their costumes were all SO HORRIBLE. flouncy and ruffly and one guy’s jacket was tiger striped i think, orange and black in the back and black and white in the front with blue sequined sleeves and are these guys BLIND? they all seemed to do a lot of falling down, too.

last night matt ratz acted like i’ve been living under a rock or something because i just noticed the uber-gay poorly dressed figure skaters. i haven’t been living under a rock. i swear.

whew. no time for another nap now. must punch down bread...

ok then,

chilly grace.

Feb. 17, 2006

if i wasn’t in this play... [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 8:56 am

i’d have been up early this morning looking at those last-minute weekend flight deals to warm climates, and then i’d have gotten on a plane and GONE.

it’s something like 18 degrees right now, and i think that’s as high as it’s supposed to be tomorow.

brrrr. ridiculous. enough is ENOUGH.

but christine says that there’s going to be lots of snow in denver for a week plus the cold weather, so maybe things aren’t quite so bad here.

bad enough.

my hair extensions were re-attached but i realized at some point during the night that i looked like a cave woman. very very bushy hair. this morning it has calmed down somewhat.

well, it’s friday, that’s a good thing. i guess next weekend will be a little odd, because i’ll suddenly have nothing going on. i must think about what to do to remedy that.

i’m going to go out in the FREEZING COLD right now. at least i have all this fake hair to keep me warm.

ok then,

chilly grace.

Feb. 16, 2006

I’M the diva???!!!! [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 6:36 pm

i’m at amy’s salon now. i came over this afternoon and asked her to re-glue a couple of the temporary hair extensions because they were falling out. one in particular was hanging down below all the other hair and this morning while trying to rush out the door i tried to glue it in again but it was in the back plus i don’t know how to do it right and then i got lots of glue all over the back of my head and my hair was pretty much a matted ratty mess.

so this afternoon Amy decided she was going to take ALL the extensions out and put them back in again. i wondered if there would be time for this but she said SURE WE’LL HAVE TIME.

Amy Time.

she took the extensions out and washed my hair and i had to go give a massage.

and then i came back at 5:30 and thought i’d have some time to relax, but my hair was feeling kind of icky and there were still some big clumps of glue in it (from other times i’d tried to re-glue it this week) so amy suggested i wash it again. so i put in more glue remover and then washed my hair again in amy’s fancy salon sink.

you know how you get your hair washed at a salon and you hang your head back and it’s all very nice and civilized and easy? it’s a different thing entirely when you’re hanging your head over the sink. for one thing, the sink is very fancy and kind of small and i soon realized that i was spraying water all over the place. plus i kept dripping all over the floor as i tried to grope around for the shampoo and then for a towel and while i was frantically trying to do all this amy was working on a client and i heard her saying the word DIVA in regards to me and i wanted to yell I’M NOT A DIVA! I’M JUST TRYING NOT TO DROWN MYSELF OR THE ENTIRE SALON HERE!

but since she’s so sweet to do all this stuff to my hair, i have to hold my tongue. even though she keeps saying i’m a DIVA and HIGH MAINTENANCE. i’m not, i swear. not.

i borrowed a hair dryer from the stylist next door because amy was using her dryer, and i managed to blow my (pathetically short it feels like) hair dry, and then i dried the extensions which felt really sticky and gross.

and now i’m waiting for her to glue them back in.

the thing is, we have a pickup rehearsal tonight, and we were supposed to be there...right now, at 6:30. i called and said i’d be there by 7:15. but she’s coloring somebody’s hair now and they’re chatting a LOT because amy chats a LOT and i wonder if i’ll get out of here tonight at all.

just wondering. not actually doing it OUT LOUD, of course. because i don’t want to get yelled at.

but i really hope i’ll be at rehearsal at least close to 7:15. it makes me slightly nervous that i’m not going to be going over the lines in the first act, but i guess there’s nothing i can do about it so i’ll just sit here and take deep breaths and everything will be good...

everything is good...

good...

ok ok ok,

thursday grace.

p.s. randy [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 8:50 am
gave me a really cool little jacket for valentine’s day, except it was too small, but he already exchanged it for a larger one. i’m quite excited about it because what with the long blonde hair which i’ll have for a few more days, plus the cute little jacket, i’ll REALLY look like a rock star. i’m going to wear it to the cast party friday night.

rock star.

when i go to LA (WHEN am i going to la? hard to say. but i’m going. at some point.) i’ll wear the jacket there. hopefully it won’t already be out of fashion by the time i get there.

i’ll just blend in with all the REAL rock stars and supermodels.

i don’t think i ever actually saw rock stars in LA, but there were plenty of supermodels. sometimes they were darting up and down the aisels at the grocery store, looking really scruffy and emaciated, and maybe they were just at the grocery store to longingly gaze at the food, none of which they were allowed to actually eat.

because i ate THOUSANDS of chips at randy’s last night... [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 8:47 am

not to mention the vast quantities of spicy chipolte dip with them, plus all kinds of other food throughout the day including random valentine’s chocolates and basically every single thing i could get my hands on...

i had many strange dreams last night.

one of them that i still remember was both boring and strange at the same time. i was making pudding. not the kind from a box, but actual from-scratch chocolate pudding (would i make anything BUT chocolate? of course not) and it took a very long time and i was just sort of making it and not reading the directions, and directions are pretty important for pudding, chocolate or otherwise, and all of a sudden a lot of it had fallen into the sink and so i had to keep trying to scoop it up and meanwhile i’d poured some cream into a pan and it was sizzling dangerously and the whole thing became a huge HUGE mess and i kept wishing i’d read the directions and this when on and on and on...

boring and strange both.

so anyway, this weekend when you FINALLY COME TO MY VERY FUNNY SHOW, i USED to be the one sashaying around in my bustier. but now instead i’ll be the one shuffling and waddling around the stage, straining at the seams of my costume, or perhaps i’ll just find a nice mumu to replace the undergarments.

there is a slight chance of not eating EVERYTHING today and tomorrow which might balance out all the eating yesterday.

but only a very slight chance.

my parents are taking a bus trip up to chicago to see the car show and i spent the night here at their house last night and before six a.m. mom appeared at the bedroom door which was confusing because i didn’t hear her coming because i was wearing my FABULOUS EARPLUGS. i asked her if we were having a fire drill. she said no, which was good because that would have probably involved getting out of bed which i had no interest in. she reminded me about taking shortie and gizmo for a walk, which i would have remembered of course, and then she told me a bunch of other stuff i have to be in charge of, staying here, but i can’t remember any of it.

let the dogs out, let the dogs in, give them food, don’t let the cats scratch the furniture. that was probably the gist of it.

i have to get up and walk the dogs now even though it looks like it might be raining out there. so that should be fun. the dogs will like it anyway and then when we’re done they’ll be little balls of mud. i’m sure i’m not supposed to let them tromp around the house spreading the mud everywhere.

that is all for now because as you can see i have a very very busy day ahead of me. in charge of some very very important things.

ok then,

morning grace.
(thursday)

Feb. 15, 2006

CHENEY SHOOTS FRIEND! [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 8:47 pm

yeah yeah yeah. i try not to shoot my friends, but then again i don’t go hunting. if i DID go hunting, i would CERTAINLY shoot somebody. probably a friend. randy, for example, he would be VERY VERY SURLY if i shot him.

randy had surgery a couple of years ago, for some awful throat thing, and it was very very bad and he was sure he was going to die and it wasn’t the MOST fun thing to be around him.

so just imagine if i shot him.

it’s just as well that i don’t go hunting, anyway.

it’s wednesday night already, the week is rocketing past as i figured it would.

but then what about next week? what will i do with myself?

tonight i had dinner at imo’s pizza and there was a poetry reading going on. poetry open mike. it was hard to get a table. i thought we’d miss the poetry, but we ended up hearing all of it.

i took a poetry-writing class in college many many years ago. it was kind of fun. i don’t have any desire to write anymore, however.

i talked to linda today and she was STILL cleaning her house. wow, it must have been unspeakably dirty, that’s all i have to say.

i have to get ready to play boggle now.

i hope your week is going swimmingly.

ok then,

wednesday night grace.

"why did I lock the door? why did YOU lock the door???" [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 11:53 am

this is the kind of thing that floats through my head all day, random snatches of dialogue from the play. that particular line is said with a british accent, and those are the lines that are really fun.

but the other lines are fun too, actually. the british lines are my character in the play within the play, Vikki, but then the lines when i’m just a dumb blonde are Brooke. Brooke doesn’t say much because she’s mostly having deep inner discussions with herself about her hair/nails/general sexy appearance. but near the beginning i just say “Yes?” and “In?” and “what?” and i know they don’t sound like anything at all but they’re really fun to do and get a laugh.

here is the info. in case you didn’t know:

ONE WEEKEND MORE ONLY. This weekend, February 17, 18,19, friday and saturday nights at 8:00 p.m. Sunday afternoon at two o'clock. At the Hoogland Center for the Arts.

You can call them and get tickets at 523-2787. CALL NOW! OPERATORS ARE STANDING BY!

and if the person answering the phone tries to tell you that it’s best to sit at the front of the loge, DON’T LISTEN! sit down in the orchestra section somewhere, because it’s better to see everything up close. the fourth or fifth rows would be ideal.

DON’T DELAY!

it has been relaxing to have a little time off, except that i’ve been pretty busy in spite of no play. and next week is just going to be WEIRD, with no show to go to. hmm, probably good, though. but also a little sad, because this is the most fun i’ve had in a show.

also, a deep worry now is that since i won’t have the motivation of appearing in my bustier onstage, what’s to keep me from immediately eating EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD and gaining SIX HUNDRED POUNDS?

i did work out this morning, and felt very virtuous doing so. it was also a good way to catch up on important news in the world, like why didn’t dick cheney come right out and say he shot his hunting partner? i mean, WHY NOT?

it seems slightly ridiculous to me. it seems like the news people don’t have enough to occupy their time. maybe they should try something novel, like going out and interviewing people about how their valentine’s day went, or if they’re doing something interesting in their lives, like this guy i know who plays the bagpipes in the st. andrew’s...band. i’ve written about it before and i know there’s more to the name than that, but that’s all i can remember at this time.

my friend linda is having the cast party on friday night, and she’s already been cleaning. even though when i go to parties and peoples' houses are immaculately clean and they TELL me they’ve been doing a lot of cleaning, i always figure that they’re lying and their houses are really that clean all the time.

COME SEE MY SHOW! FRIDAY, SATURDAY, SUNDAY!

ok then,

february grace.

Feb. 13, 2006

one more little thing... [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 11:24 pm

so i’m sure you know that comedy usually comes in threes. which is why, earlier in the day, at least a few minutes before i wrote that last entry, i knew the story about my shopping experiences was funny.

three separate incidents.

except of course by the time i actually got to a computer - and only about 15 minutes had passed and WHAT WILL I BE LIKE WHEN I’M OLDER, I’LL NEVER EVER REMEMBER A DAMN THING (but at least everything will always be fresh and new to me) but after i went to the cardologist and on the way to food fantasies, i stopped in at Osco Drugs. i was wearing my big black fake fur coat that’s super soft and warm and my friend ann always wants to pet me when she sees it. i went to the checkout and the clerk said “can i touch your coat?”

so i let him. he seemed very young and sweet. he then mumbled something but i didn’t quite catch it.

anyway, that’s the missing part of the three amusing incidents, shopping-wise.

it’s now late but not UNACCEPTABLY late and i have before me the prospect of getting to sleep BEFORE MIDNIGHT , plus WITH EARPLUGS and not a very taxing day tomorrow, so life is good.

yes sirree, life, good.

good.

quite good.

goodnight,

grace s.

so many things... [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 3:08 pm

first of all, i’m not as well-rested as i thought i was when i was still sitting in bed typing. shortely thereafter i was once again longing for a nap. i expressed this longing to two different people and they both said BUT YOU GOT EIGHT AND A HALF HOURS OF SLEEP LAST NIGHT. WITH EAR PLUGS.

because of course they’d read that here. so now am i even going to have to censor my sleeping habits?

soon the blog will be nothing more than a recitation of what i had for dinner last night, which is just about the only thing i wrote about consistently in my very first diary at the age of ten. “tonight we had hamburgers for dinner.”

actually i’d love a hamburger right now.

last night i went to randy’s where he made a feast of taco salad and i kept eating and eating and it was really delicious. and we watched the DVD i bought on impulse, “wallace & grommit - curse of the were-rabbit” and it was SO FUNNY. except i was almost falling asleep. but it’s ok because i’ll get to watch it whenever i want because i own it. i don’t own many movies, but i’m glad i have that one. except right now randy has it because i left it at his house but luckily i remember where he lives.

today i was at the cardologist and kathy twyman, who used to be my neighbor, waited on me and said “oh, you’re not just in your underwear.” i was taken aback especially because there were other people in line, but then i figured she’d seen the play, but she’d just heard about it from Mom.

and then i went to food fantasies and the guy who waited on me there said “you and your sister should start a band.” I told him that amy had had a band, and he already knew this and knew most of the people in that band, and then i told him i can’t really sing and he said i could tell jokes and i said i didn’t know if that was something that somebody did in a band, but i suggested that perhaps i could dance. and then the girl standing next to the guy waiting on me said “yeah, you could be a go-go dancer.” the guy, whose name i should know, has a band of his own. most people, it seems, either had or have a band. except for me. because of the lack of talent, singing-wise.

actually, if i had a great voice i would DEFINITELY be using it all the time. in a band, in a play, in something somewhere, constantly. you people with great voices are really lucky and you should sing whenever you can.

anyway that’s me, grace smith, go-go dancer. in my bustier, of course.

i think i have time for a quick nap before some massages...

ok then,

monday afternoon grace.

monday morning in february [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 9:20 am

gee, how did it get to be almost mid-february already? the month has rocketed past.

i slept for eight and a half hours last night. this is astounding for me, personally, and it is spectacular to start the week well-rested. for a change.

and i don’t have to go to the play tonight! nor tomorrow night, nor wednesday.

but i have to say that when i first woke up, the first thing i thought of was this part in the second act where i keep messing up the lines. it’s when i’m “onstage” but actually behind the set and saying the lines so the audience can’t see me, but i’m so VERY ANNOYED that i keep messing it up. so i’m going to look at that part in a minute and try to figure out why i keep messing up.

but i’m not going to obsess about it all day or anything. i may not obsess about anything today, as a matter of fact! just for the fun of it.

i think my life has changed dramatically because i’ve decided to wear earplugs all the time.

well, at least when i’m sleeping.

maybe not so much during the day. but you never know.

all right, this is going to be a good week - especially because all the GODDAMN SNOW is going to melt, and i heard it’s supposed to be in the 50’s on tuesday. and wait, that’s TOMORROW.

it’s february, time for spring.

ok then, ok,

monday grace.

Feb. 12, 2006

sunday evening. [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 6:13 pm

TIRED. is that all i ever am in my life, tired?

but tonight, REALLY REALLY tired.

the show last night went well. the crowd, although not that big, was bigger than opening night, and they laughed even more. this afternoon...well, at first we thought maybe they’d all died. not a lot of laughter. but then of course by the second act they couldn’t help themselves, they had to laugh.

there was a big contingent of red-hat ladies and they all left at the end of the first act.

too bad for them.

was it me in my lingerie? was it Lloyd saying “fuck?” it’s a mystery to me.

i’m never ever going to be a red hat lady.

even though i do look good in hats. and red is one of my favorite colors.

BUT NEVER A RED HAT LADY! when i was in Hobby Lobby the other day i noticed an entire AISLE of red hat crap. i didn’t actually go down the aisle to see what particular kind of RHC they were hawking because it seemed too icky.

did i mention how tired i am?

i DID NOT eat everything at the party last night.

i made spanikopeta, and was glad i did because Christine loves it and she ate about 15 pieces. she and paolo just barely made it to the show in time; they arrived at 7:50 for the 8:00 show. they liked it a lot, though, and it was fun to look out and see them there.

but then they had to drive back to chicago. they had time to be at the party for about 50 minutes, and then they had to make the long drive. so they spent more time driving from there to here and back again than they did being here in spfld. all that paolo has ever seen of spfld. is the Center for the Arts and Bridget and Matt’s house. it was dark when they arrived, so they didn’t get to see anything, really. but maybe that’s just as well, because of all that snow on the ground, that’s not when spfld. looks its best. maybe paolo can come back in the spring when the grass is green and the leaves are back on the trees.

please come see the show. it’s VERY VERY funny.

i’m not going to beg or anything. but it will be TOO BAD if you don’t see it.

laughter is good for many maladies, including jaundice, whooping cough, the plague, colds & flu, bronchitis and botulism. it is especially effective in stopping the BIRD FLU which we all know will be here AT ANY MOMENT.

last night i noticed at the party that pam started talking with a british accent. i thought this was funny because i’ve been doing the same thing; i’ll be talking and then i’ll suddenly just launch into the accent. i remember at the first rehearsal when some of us were a little tentative about doing it, but now it’s like second nature.

today in the bathroom after the show a woman asked me if we were all from springfield. i thought this was an odd question, but it was because she thought our accents were SO GREAT that mayb some of us actually ARE british!

that is all for now.

MONDAY, GOOD LORD ABOVE, how is that going to be? i wish i had the day off tomorrow.

ok ok ok,

sleepy sunday night grace.

Feb. 11, 2006

A LIFE-CHANGING PHENOMENON [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 10:15 am

let me just say this: EARPLUGS. somebody kept telling me i should wear earplugs at night to help me sleep and i thought this was a good idea in theory. but last night i finally FINALLY put some in some fabulous earplugs that i’ve had for a long long time and haven’t used.

and i didn’t wake up this morning till JUST NOW. and it’s almost ten.

A MIRACLE!

a great way to start my weekend.

oh yeah, and there was the show last night...

well, first of all, the hair extensions went well and amy made big banana curls all over my head and i felt just like little bo peep and longed desperately for a frilly dress and a staff. it was fun to go out to lunch and run some errands with this ridiculously long curly hair. boing boing went the curls, like sally in charlie brown.

no nap indeed, because i didn’t want to squash them.

i started getting a little nervous around five o'clock last night which i hadn’t expected. i suddenly found myself with nothing to do, so i went to the theater pretty early, and on the drive over the nerves went away.

because i was there so early i was of course ready to go really really early and i started getting bored. i fluffed my hair out and put on my makeup and costume and waited and waited for time to pass.

and then, when we were FINALLY standing backstage getting ready to go on, i got excited about doing it.

and then...it was fun. it was SO FUN. i’m lucky because my part is pretty easy and fun. yeah, i do have to run up and down the stairs a million times (approximately) in my very tall heels, but that’s not so bad. i get a little warm doing it, but since i’m not wearing many clothes it’s not so bad. not like patrick in his WOOL JACKET, and he has to do a lot more than me, and at one point backstage i worried that he might actually spontaneously combust. is it too late to get him a lighter jacket?

it was so fun. it was the best we’d done; there were a few times when the lines we were saying didn’t match exactly the written lines, but it didn’t matter because we kept going. at one point in the third act patrick was saying all kinds of things (i’m sure he was completely delirious from the heat/fatigue at this point) and he kept saying stuff and i kept saying stuff in response and eventually we got to the right place where we were supposed to be. it was so funny to me that i almost laughed, which wouldn’t have been appropriate at all.

i realized why i love being in plays. i do love doing my one-woman shows because i love writing them and they’re so fun to perform. but the great thing about a play is that it’s not a solitary venture. there are all these other people around you, and we’re all in it together.

that’s a great feeling. many things i’ve always done in my life have been just me alone, and it sure is good to have others there to share the experience with.

nearing the end of act three, there’s a long stretch where i’m crawling around behind the couch and i don’t have to do anything really for the rest of the play and i started getting kind of sad that it was almost over. i think i’m definitely going to miss it when it’s ALL over. but hey, we still have five more performances.

there was a decent crowd last night, and it was a FANTASTIC crowd because they LAUGHED. this was so awesome because that’s been the most challenging thing about the rehearsal process, doing the stuff with no reaction at all. a few titters and grins here and there from the staff watching it, but having a real live audience was great. there were things that made me laugh every time, like when jim says “little hugs and squeezes” and the audience laughed a lot at that.

fun. it was so much fun. i wish i could do it all the time.

now, the party on the other hand...

ok, for one thing, i was STARVING.

let me say it again.

STAR-VING.

but so i got there and felt the need to eat ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING.

EVERY SINGLE THING.

it was like i’d suddenly forgotten that i have to be in my underwear YET AGAIN TONIGHT, and somehow i felt that i HAD TO EAT EVERYTHING.

not good. not good at all. bad, bad grace.

tonight will be different. NO MORE EATING EVERYTHING.

i promise.

christine and paolo are going to the party with me, and i’ll tell them to NOT LET ME EAT EVERYTHING.

maybe i’ll bring along some duct tape and put it over my mouth.

but then again that might make it slightly difficult to talk to people.

the other bad thing is that i kept staying at the party later and later and later and then it was TWO IN THE MORNING and i had a very long drive home and then i’d have to take off my makeup and MY GOD I WASN’T GOING TO GET ENOUGH SLEEP.

but so i got to bed at three and i put in the earplugs and even though it would have been good to have another hour of sleep, it’s all good.

a nap is definitely in order this afternoon.

oh yeah, and i’m not going to even mention my ABSOLUTE HORROR at all the SNOW covering the ground at this time. no to mention the snow FALLING FROM THE SKY.

today, i’m going to focus on NOT eating everything tonight at the party, and NOT looking outside.

whew. i’m going to get up and make some spanikopeta for the party now. it’s very delicious and i love it but i’m NOT GOING TO EAT ALL OF IT. i’m bringing it to share with others.

that is all at this time. i hope your saturday is fulfilling and i hope you COME SEE THE SHOW!

ok then,

saturday grace, full of glee.

Feb. 10, 2006

THE BIG DAY! [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 12:22 pm
opening night, that is. i’m at amy’s salon waiting for her to put temporary hair extensions in my hair. she had me go get the glue for them on my way over here, but she couldn’t exactly remember the name of the place; maybe it’s called mr. j’s? and she thought it was at 11th and cook.

no beauty supply store there at all. i called her, i drove around a little bit, and ended up at a place on 9th and cook called “clare’s,” i think. the asian guy who was the owner was very nice, but he got frustrated with me because i kept pestering him with questions and then he showed me photos on his phone of women with hair extensions and then i had to go get my phone out of my car and call amy and then she talked to him and now i’ve got this glue he recommended even though it’s not the stuff we used before and THAT stuff stayed in a good long time.

so i guess we’ll just see.

i was supposed to get here AT NOON, but she’s working on somebody right now so i have this little opportunity to write.

this morning i did many busy thing mostly involving cleaning bathrooms. GOD, what a glamorous life i lead! i have to make some hummus this afternoon for the party, and i have to paint my nails.

i’d like to nap, but theoretically when i leave here my hair will be really big and so the only napping i could do would be standing up.

maybe i’ll just have lots and lots of caffeine at lunch, instead.

rehearsal last night was easy, thank god, because i was tired and sore after the afternoon massages. we sat around doing our lines for the first and third acts, and walked through the second act but it wasn’t a big deal and i didn’t have to wear my high heels and i didn’t have to run up and down the stairs.

we got done pretty early and i was going to go home, i mean, i got in my car and headed down the street, and then i thought, maybe i should just go have one drink with people from the play. because i was just going to go home and have a drink by myself before going to bed EARLY, but then i decided if there was a parking place right in front of the bar, i’d go in.

so i did. and i stayed. and stayed. and didn’t end up going to bed early at all.

but it’s all good. OPENING NIGHT! it’s going to be good. i hope some people show up.

please tell everybody you know.

the story in the paper yesterday was pretty brief and they didn’t mention my name at all. i wasn’t in either of the photos, either. and instead of being on the cover, there was instead a photo of this band of hooligans with lots of tattos looking all bad-ass and rings through their noses and WHO CARES ABOUT THESE DUMB GUYS???

oh well. it’s going to be fun to do the show in front of an audience, no matter how big (or small) it will be. it’s going to be great to hear some laughter (hopefully) because i’m so used to the lines and the action that nothing seems so funny anymore.

the thing is, though, some things still are funny to me. this is a sign of a good comedy. anything jim hepworth does makes me laugh. when linda says in the second (or is it the third?) act, “you don’t know NOTHIN!” when she’s supposed to say “you don’t know anything,” that always makes me smile.

when troy came out the other night with his shiek robes on and his big sunglasses, i had to laugh.

and of course it’s always funny when patrick is lying on the ground and we all think he’s dead but he manages to croak out some lines.

and then there’s pam looking like a loony nutcase after she’s tied patrick’s shoelaces together, and she’s running around the stage chortling and pantomiming what she’s done.

it’s gonna be fun.

if only i could nap.

carry on, then.

friday grace.

Feb. 09, 2006

Walking Wounded [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 8:35 am

in the first act of the play, after my character, Brooke, has done bodily injury to two of my fellow cast members, the guy playing the director, Lloyd, has a line, “walking wounded carry the stretched cases.”

that’s how i felt last night. i wanted somebody to carry me home.

it all started painlessly. one of my garters SPROINGED off, and i was a little distracted trying to attach it again. this was during the first act; afterwards, patrick said when it came off it hit the door behind me and made a loud noise. i didn’t hear, because i was focused on trying to re-attach it.

but this was no big deal.

during the second act, i’ve written about how the entire set is turned around backwards so the audience can see what’s going on behind the scenes. about halfway through i crawl around on the floor then i get up and pretend to smack my head against the window frame, then i fall over the couch.

it didn’t go so well last night, and i’m not sure why. the window smack wasn’t quite right, and then when i went to fall over the couch there was a bag on it and maybe some other things, and i just didn’t do it right and i jammed my finger and i might have hurt my back, but i’m not sure.

i felt a little unsteady after that, but the lines i had to deliver were behind a wall, so it was ok. then i had to run upstairs. i was standing there and all of a sudden there was this realy loud THUNK. i reeled. a large picture attached to the wall above me fell. on my head.

now, i don’t think this was a light picture. and it was pretty big; i’d say about two feet by four, maybe? the pain in my head was intense, and now i really felt wobbly. i had more lines to deliver, and i kept going, and the assistant director, susan, rushed over with a flashlight to see if i was still alive. i kept feeling around in my hair to see if my head had split open, but i didn’t even feel any blood.

i got through the rest of the act, went in the dressing room, and my shoulder was bright red and hurt a lot, and i had a scrape on my back. i didn’t know if this was from falling over the couch or getting hit with the painting. i mostly felt shaken, and took the only drug i could find in my purse, a lone Motrin.

before the third act i was walking around trying to see if my props were where they were supposed to be, and somebody had put them in place, and i thought all was ok. but then Troy reminded me that i was supposed to be wearing my dress. i was walking around in my bustier, and if he hadn’t said something i’m pretty sure i’d have gone on without it.

i felt a little better, but then Patrick had to throw the phone offstage right next to me after i exit. it landed on the very tip of my toe, and the pain was sharp and tears started to well up in my eyes. at this point i decided there was little chance of making it through the rest of the play alive.

patrick came off stage and apologized a lot, but of course it was an accident. and the play just kept going, and the funny thing is, it’s the best it’s been so far. i mean, really good.

all I wanted was to go home and sleep.

this morning there’s just a little bump on my head, my shoulder seems fairly ok, and it’s only my back that hurts.

whew.

tonight we’re doing a quick run-through with no props or costumes, so we’ll get done early. this is a good thing. i have a busy day, massage-wise, and i wish i didn’t.

but it’s all good. really. today there’s going to be an article and a photo in the paper, but i heard last night that we didn’t make the cover of the arts & entertainment section. this is disappointing because they ALWAYS put a picture on the cover. i’m worried that we won’t have very big crowds because we’ve had almost no advertising and most people haven’t even heard of the play.

i figure the only thing that might bring people in is word of mouth. so please, come see the play and tell your friends.

i am looking forward to opening night. TOMORROW. my family will be there. and saturday night, my friend christine is coming! yesterday she decided to get a ticket to visit a guy, Paolo, who’s in Chicago at the moment, and she’s getting in at two in the afternoon on saturday and they’re going to drive down here and see the show. hopefully her plane won’t be delayed.

i can’t think of anything more to say right now. except my neck hurts, too.

quit complaining. you didn’t BREAK anything. you’re not BLEEDING.

true, very true.

ok then. i hope your day has nothing unexpectedly painful in it. which is what i’m hoping for myself.

grace.

Feb. 08, 2006

OH. MY. GOD. [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 8:36 am

i woke up a little while ago, and was lying in bed feeling pretty good about life because i’d somehow managed to sleep through most of the night. i didn’t wake up till six, and was able to go back to sleep for a while longer, so i felt that the day is going to be GOOD.

AND THEN I LOOKED OUTSIDE.

SNOW.

OH. MY. GOD.

i thought we were done with all that.

I THOUGHT WE WERE DONE WITH ALL THAT.

remember the article in the paper, the one in late december or early january that said the rest of the winter was going to be MILD and all the badness was BEHIND US???

badness. right outside my door.

ok, i have to admit that after my initial shock-n-horror, i looked more closely and the amount of snow on the ground is fairly insignificant.

the thing i really hate, though, is that it covers up all the ground, thereby making it seem much more wintery. if there’s no snow, i can look out and imagine that spring is right around the corner.

snow. not a good way to start my day.

but ok, ok, now i’m suddenly resolved. i’ll IGNORE it. yep, that’s what i’ll do. i won’t look outside. when i was at the mall the other day, in the middle court there are all these little booths selling all kinds of crap, and one of them had a display of these cheesy things, they’re photos of islands and waterfalls and stuff but they have lights in the back and so it looks like the water is moving. cheesy, yes, but maybe if i had a bunch of those and put them in all the windows, i could imagine that i’m someplace warm and sunny.

oh WAIT, that’s RIGHT...i’m theoretically going to be headed to LA in the not-too-distant future. tentative plans now for the end of march. i’m waiting to get the official word from jerri and brendan, the official news of the actual date, news that this is actually, really, definitely going to happen.

i’m being very patient about it.

except that now there’s this snow on the ground...

rehearsal went pretty well last night, except when i got home i was thinking about how i’m never quite sure how it’s going to go when i get onstage. sometimes we say the lines exactly as they’re written, sometimes we say other things, but it’s always sort of close to what’s supposed to be happening. there were a few times when people were on stage and nobody said anything, but i don’t believe i was involved in any of that.

and now it’s COMING RIGHT UP, opening night. i feel ready.

pretty ready.

fairly ready.

why not?

ok, i have to go outside and ignore the snow. i am glad i have new tires now, because the guys at my car place (FLOYD IMPORTS, by the way, and they’re the best guys in town) have kept telling me that i really need new tires for a while now, and they’re always usually pretty low key about stuff i need to have done, so i know it was way past time when i needed them.

i hope your wednesday is good in every way.

or at least in some ways.

or at the VERY least, one way.

ok ok ok,

wednesday morning grace.

Feb. 07, 2006

clocks, elephants, and, of course, napping. [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 2:38 pm

just this morning i wrote to somebody about turning back the clock, and when driving to work i passed that sign on 6th street where they’re always changing the phrase and today it read “you can’t turn back the clock, but you can wind it up again.”

i felt like it was speaking to me, like in LA Story when the road signs keep giving steve martin all kinds of cryptic and good advice.

as i continued down 6th street (i bought new tires yesterday and somebody asked if i could tell a difference in the feel of the car and OF COURSE i couldn’t but today i’ve been noticing that i don’t have to even bother to put my hands on the wheel at all as long as i’m going in a straight line. because not only do i have 4 lovely new tires, but my car is also ALIGNED now, thank GOD), i passed the hoogland center, and there was ed, the director of my play, and linda, both coming out of the place.

this morning it was like everything everywhere was all connected.

of course i know it IS all connected, but sometimes i feel more like the boy in the plastic bubble. did you ever see that old old movie with john travolta? and that woman who played his mother, but then they were a couple? but she tragically died young (not that anybody could die young any way other than tragically).

not to bring you down or anything, but i just heard that wendy wasserstein passed away. this happened last week apparently; she died of ovarian cancer. i was so shocked to hear that she’d died. she’s a playwright, in case you don’t know of her. her earliest and most famous play was “the heidi chronicles.” she wrote funny, literate stuff, and i just can’t believe she’s dead.

this is a good example of the importance of LIVING EVERY MOMENT TO THE FULLEST. cause you just never know.

ok, that’s all about death for now.

yesterday i got my 45 RPM record of the babar song, with “the big grey elephant team” on the flip side and my parents have a really cool record player that i listened to them on and i LOVE my record! it looks a little beat up, but 45s are very very sturdy.

i’ve never ever tried karaoke (MUCH too terrifying to contemplate), but if they just played the babar song or the big grey elephant team i’d RUSH to sing either song.

maybe i’ll make my own music video of one or both.

when i have a little more free time.

i’m typing as fast as i can now (about 216 words per minute, i believe; my fingers are merely a blur over the keyboard) because i MUST HAVE A NAP. i have to give two massages this afternoon and i have just about no energy.

last night rehearsal went pretty darn well. it went well for me, except the couple of times when i just completely forgot that i even had a line, much less what that line might have been. but patrick bailed me out because he’s suddenly SHARP AS A TACK, and he even fell down the stairs which he’s supposed to do but nobody ever showed him how. i’m on the floor myself when he does this so i didn’t get to see all the fall, but tonight i’m going to watch, because it’s my last chance before i have to really do what i’m supposed to be doing instead of watching somebody else.

a photographer was there from the state journal-register and he stayed the ENTIRE TIME and kept taking lots and lots of photos. i noticed that he didn’t seem to want to take any photos of me when i was just wearing the lingerie, and that’s a good thing. i saw the very end of the commercial for the play on tv today, but it was the very end and it was just a shot of matt ratz standing there in his jeans. so it didn’t look exactly fascinating. not that matt isn’t a fascinating fellow, he IS. but what i saw didn’t make me think people will be rushing out to buy tickets.

i hear that ticket sales are a little slow, so BUY YOUR TICKETS! and be sure to sit in the middle section because many funny things happen on the sides of the stage, and if you’re sitting on the side you’ll miss some of it.

ok, i’m starting to eat into my valuable NAP TIME.

ok ok ok,

tuesday grace.

Feb. 06, 2006

SLEEP! [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 8:19 am

i’m thinking about all the little kids who DO NOT WANT TO NAP, who DO NOT WANT TO GO TO BED...and how is it that a person could get from that state over the years, to waking up on a monday morning and being so DELIGHTED at all the sleep they got?

i went to bed b4 eleven for the first time in about 67 years, and i slept, and slept, and slept. so now this morning i’m feeling...RESTED.

i used to feel rested almost all the time, but i haven’t felt rested for...too long.

today looks like a good day, sunny anyway, although i’m not too crazy about the bitter cold. i’m going to work out first thing, and then i’m seriously contemplating the hot hot hot tub at the club.

i have a little work today but not too much, and then i have to do things like buying new tires. not so taxing. if i want one, i even have time for a nap.

how do all those winning football players feel this morning? good, i bet. unless they’re too hung over. gee, how many beers would a football player have to drink to feel any effect from the alcohol? especially those really pudgy football players, the ones whose shirts were stretched awfully tight over their great big stomachs. lots of beer, i bet. more than two.

and how about the losing football players? not such a happy morning for them, huh? but at least they got to be IN the super bowl.

randy wanted to know why there are no women in any of these sports. we thought that maybe that one player with the really long curly black hair cascading out of this helmet and down his back might secretly be a girl. wouldn’t somebody want to pull his hair when he was running by them? not to mention how tangled it would get.

things to think about on monday morning.

ok then,

grace.

Feb. 05, 2006

THE GAME ENDED! [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 10:50 pm

just in case you were thinking that it was going to go on forever, a melee of running and tackling and throwing and lots and lots of men grabbing each other. if you came to earth from another planet and watched football, would you think it might be a gay sport? i’m just asking.

lots and lots of grabbing each other.

but it had to come to an end, no more kicking and punting and drinking beer and eating pizza and eating all kinds of stuff...

the rolling stones at halftime were...very rolling-stone like. that keith richards, how is it that he’s still up and living? and his hair, boy it’s horrible and black. mick jagger looked pretty good for a guy who has lived such a life as his, and he’s at least 85, isn’t he? i hope i look that good at 85. except i’m not planning on any plastic surgery. and i know my legs could never be that skinny.

i have to say that when he was dressed in that long sparkly black jacket and he was literally, i mean literally SKIPPING around on the stage, i thought, hmm, once again, gay? of COURSE not, but do you know any straight men who could get away with skipping in a beaded jacket?

it’s a rock star thing, i know. but still.

i guess mick has realized that skipping is a great, great way to get places. you can move really quickly, and it’s fun. it’s the only thing i could do as a child without injuring myself.

ok, that’s not entirely true. i’m pretty sure i was skipping when i crashed through our neighbor’s glass front door and neatly sliced the side of my hand open. the scar is pretty impressive, but since it’s neatly down the side of my hand you don’t really notice it, but it does look like this is where they sewed me up after replacing my entire epidermis. is that the right word, epidermis? all my skin. if i was actually a bionic woman and they replaced all of my insides with bionic things so i’d be faster and stronger and better than anybody else, this is a logical place where they’d then re-apply the skin.

i bet you’re glad i write instead of doing any kind of surgery or anything.

i know i am.

after the halftime we played a game of boggle which seemed to last forever. randy claimed that he was “preoccupied by the game,” which is why he totally lost, but i think he was bound to lose at some point, a person can’t win forever.

instead of beer i had bloody marys with my pizza. the pizza was delicious but i think one bloody mary is really all i ever want anymore. more than that is just too much.

it’s not even 11, and i’m going to sleep now. because i have a very busy week ahead of me.

i hope yours goes well.

ok then,

sunday night grace.

REPORTING FROM THE SUPER BOWL... [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 6:39 pm

randy said “the game is sort of boring so far” (we’re in the second quarter right now), and i said “that’s because it’s football.”

the ads are sort of entertaining.

we decided we like pittsburgh instead of seattle because the seahawks (which randy calls the sea monkeys) isn’t a “real” team. i’m not entirely sure why, except they’ve only been a team for 12 years and they’re just a team because some rich guy wanted to have a team and so he made this team.

but isn’t that the way it usually is? probably not. but isn’t that really what most of life is like, the way the world runs, it’s a bunch of rich guys deciding on whatever?

i had a bloody mary and it was delicious. i may have another one in a minute.

five days till opening night. how is that possible? five days. doesn’t seem possible.

i went over all my lines today, and of course they go smoothly when it’s just me, sitting there doing them by myself.

i read a pretty funny article in the wall street journal about pizza delivery during the super bowl. it’s maybe the biggest day of the year for pizza delivery.

we had some frozen pizza, actually, and it was quite delicious.

quite.

today i got one of the funniest phone message i’ve ever received. funny in an unusual sense, anyway. it was pam, from my play, who said “when you go off in the third act, does patrick hand you the phone, or does he throw it out the door.” it was so funny to have somebody ask me that in a phone message.

i called her and told her (he throws it).

so at least we have that one little bit of business straightened out.

whew, that’s a load off my mind.

OH! i have to go back to the game! because there’s all kinds of throwing and catching and tackling and running going on and I’M MISSING IT!!!

darnit.

damnit.

damnitall.

ok then, KEEP WATCHING,

superbowl fever grace.

(only a very slight fever, not above 99.9).

so... [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 12:31 am

sort of a weird, melancholy evening.

nope, no details. you can ask me, and maybe i’ll tell you.

maybe i won’t.

i didn’t even look at my script today, and i did work out but didn’t avail myself of the hot tub nor the sauna. i don’t know why not.

tomorrow, superbowl sunday, I HOPE YOU’RE READY.

i need some sleep now.

ok then, ok,

late saturday grace.

Feb. 04, 2006

writing early in the morning [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 6:33 am

it’s a little after six a.m. and i’ve been awake for about 45 minutes now, so i thought i might as well do a little writing. the REALLY weird thing is that i wrote on here early in the morning yesterday but i didn’t remember that i had.

writing early in the morning, you can’t believe anything i’m writing because clearly i’m writing in my sleep.

my cat is sitting in my lap right now which makes it a little bit challenging to type. he doesn’t seem totaly thrilled that i’m writing, but he is purring, so he’s not too upset about it. but i know he’d really like it if i turned off the light and attempted sleeping again. and least HE’S always able to sleep!

last night rehearsal was...bizarre. i guess that’s the best way to describe it. we managed to keep going most of the time, which was good, but there were many many things we did wrong. but the great thing about this show is that you probably wouldn’t have been able to see what was wrong, because there’s so much of it that is disjointed and doesn’t necessarily make any sense anyway.

one thing that happened is we’re supposed to rush into a room and the door just wouldn’t open. this was particularly funny because we do so much with doors in the play, rushing in and out of them all the time, and in the play the doors don’t open and shut correctly sometimes and we have to pretend that they’re not working. so it was funny when the door actually wasn’t working.

after rehearsal many of us when out for drinks and ed bought the first round for everyone, which was quite nice.

ed’s mother-in-law also sent CUPCAKES to rehearsal with him and i ate a chocolate cupcake with red white and blue sprinkles (for an early 4th of july, perhaps?) and it was DELICIOUS.

i think it’s supposed to be grey and cold here today, which is fine, because maybe i’ll just spend a good portion of the day sleeping really really really late.

(this of course is my neverending fantasy that never actually comes true).

maybe, when i’m not actually sleeping, i’ll read some of the books piled next to my bed. it’s more like a sprawl of books than a pile, because i never can keep them all stacked up. perhaps i should put a few of them away, sinc i’m not going to read ALL of them right now, and realistically i probably won’t read any of them.

maybe at least one. or two.

i feel like throwing the SHAPE magazine away. the skinny bikini-clad model on the cover seems to be smirking annoyingly at me.

last night at the bar, the prop master’s wife, annie was talking to me. she’d seen my in my bustier the night before and she said i looked “womanly.” Uh oh. i said “you mean FAT?” of course she said no, but she does have me worried now. what’s she going to say, "yeah, grace, you looked FAT LIKE A HOUSE.

annoying model smirking at me from the cover of the magazine.

when i’m not lying in bed sleeping or reading, maybe i’ll go work out a little only in order to go sit in the hot tub at the club. because it’s HOT. or maybe i’ll just say, screw the working out, i’m just going to sit in the hot tub.

and then maybe i’ll spend some time in the sauna, which sounds appealing and warm. maybe i’ll just SWEAT the pounds away.

it’s a little freaky to think of the show starting a short week from now.

just a little freaky.

definitely, definitely, when i’m not sleeping/reading/in the hot tub at the fit club, i’m going to be intensely studying my script. the problem is that i do my lines perfectly when i’m not actually there at rehearsal.

ok, back to sleep i go.

goodnight. good morning. i hope your weekend is full of good things.

really early saturday grace.

Feb. 03, 2006

supermodels? [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 5:08 am

christine is in LA right now, at jerri and brendan’s fabulous place across from the staples center. i haven’t heard from her, so i’m sorry to say that i can’t give you a supermodel report.

i just checked my e-mail and i haven’t heard from anybody at all in the past few hours since i went to sleep.

is nobody else wide awake right now? i know there are plenty of wide awake people all over the place, but they’re just not writing to me.

i did get at least three or so good hours of sleep, drug-free, but then BOINK went my eyes (the sound of my eyes opening really quickly), and there i was, wide awake. i finally got out of bed and took a half an antihistamine, and it’s been about 15 minutes now and i’m feeling like i should get up and clean the bedroom or something.

rehearsal wasn’t so bad, really. much improved. first there was the tv commercial, which went ok. if you’re dying to see it, i don’t know when it’s going to be on. WICS, i assume sometime next week. maybe i’ll see it when i’m giving massages at the hospital. luckily nobody would recognize me, at least not the people getting the massages.

of course, my inclination would be to say HEY, THERE I AM ON TV! that would be funny, but i won’t do it.

we started with act two, because the set was turned that way. it went ok, except for the times when we just totally forgot what to say. not too bad, though. then the set was turned around and we did act one, and it wasn’t so great, and it took an hour, and we’ve done it in 45 minutes before. how were we so slow? once again, the times of just standing there not saying anything at all.

i was tired and hungry after all that, and it was after ten o'clock. my stomach started growling. bridget said she thought she had some peanuts, but i found an energy bar in my purse and wolfed it down. right before i was about to begin act three, she appeared with a BAG OF CHOCOLATES which was a spectacular way to begin the final act.

which wasn’t so bad; we did it in 28 minutes, which is the length it should be, and we pretty much said many of the correct lines in the correct places.

my shoes are too loud. i don’t know what i’m supposed to put on the bottom of them to make them less loud, and i tried to not CLOMP CLOMP CLOMP so much, but there were many times, especially during the second act when i was late, that i had to rush up and down the stairs, and it was hard to try to be quiet while hurrying.

amy curled my hair and it looked great for about 15 minutes. then it sort of fell, which is to be expected with ultra-fine hair like mine.

5:02 a.m. right now. sleep? anyone?

i’m looking forward to the weekend. sleeping in. getting some laundry done.

one night at rehearsal jim hepworth said something about what an exciting life i’ve led.

yep, sleeping late and doing laundry. doesn’t get much more thrilling than that.

ok then,

firday morning grace, and i guess i could get up now if i really wanted to and work out or do something productive since i FEEL wide awake, but i would probably deeply DEEPLY regret this in a few hours.

Feb. 02, 2006

ONE MORE CHANCE TO SEE JIM GAFFIGAN! [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 6:01 pm
his show is going to be repeated again on comedy central on SATURDAY FEBRUARY 4TH. that’s THIS SATURDAY. i don’t know what time, i haven’t looked it up, but so you BETTER WATCH IT!

even my dad was laughing when we were watching the special. DAD RARELY LAUGHS.

jim, gaffigan, very very funny guy.
i’m sitting at amy’s salon after a very very busy day, waiting for her to curl my hair. but i really need to leave here in about 15 minutes, and it doesn’t seem that she’s anywhere near ready to curl it because she’s hard at work on somebody else.

so i have these few brief moments to write.

but do i realy have anything new to say here?

ARE YOU READY FOR THE SUPERBOWL? i guess that’s about it.

christine is arriving in LA tonight. hopefully i’ll get a supermodels in elevators report very soon.

amy has to curl my hair because they’re shooting the commercial tonight. i’m supposed to be there at 6:30. maybe i’ll be a little late.

ok ok ok, more later, more later,

very busy grace

Feb. 01, 2006

wednesday later in the day. [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 5:21 pm

ok, yeah, it was warm and sunny this afternoon, but i started running just in my running shorts, a t-shirt and my bright yellow hoodie (sp?) and i was FREEZING. i said to myself I’M GOING TO TURN AROUND AFTER 10 MINUTES. but then after about 15 minutes it wasn’t so bad, and i ended up running for FORTY TWO MINUTES. not bad. except before that i did lots and lots of weight machines at the club, and so right now my legs are kind of...extremely tired.

extremely.

ARE YOU READY FOR THE SUPER BOWL? that’s what a headline screamed at me. hmm, what is one to do to get ready for it, i wonder. not that i’m going to watch it or anything. maybe people will be cleaning their houses because they’re going to have super bowl parties? and buying lots and lots of beer?

but what are the ACTUAL ATHLETES doing right now, i wonder. not cleaning. not buying beer.

they have people to clean and buy beer FOR them.

because they’re professional athletes.

i had a few free moments to skim through shape magazine, to check out the BETTER BODY IN TEN DAYS article and it was, as i’d suspected, fairly retarded. on day one all you’re supposed to do is DRINK LOTS AND LOTS OF WATER.

whatever. i do that already.

i have to work now.

ok then,

grace.

midday report [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 11:33 am

ugghhhh...ok, i’ve been functioning all day so far, moving about, doing things, pretending to be a functioning person.

but i’m still pretty much sound asleep.

tonight, TONIGHT i go to bed at a reasonable hour.

pledge to self.

today i told christine that since she doesn’t want to take pictures of the models on the elevators, at least she could call me when she’s on the elevator and tell me that she’s there with supermodels. she said she would only because they don’t speak english.

ok, a bevy of activities this afternoon. tonight at rehearsal we’re going to run lines and paint the set, which sounds kind of fun, actually. two of the cast won’t be there, so that’s why we’re doing that. and then tomorrow they’re shooting a tv commercial which maybe i won’t ahve to be in. some insolent fellow in the play said “of course they’re going to want a shot of you in your underwear, grace.”

but randy says if they did that, they wouldn’t show it on channel 20. or whatever channel it is now.

randy told me a very very very funny (and also rather gross and disgusting) story, but he WILL NOT let me write about it here. so if you see him, ask him, and maybe he’ll tell you what it is.

ok already,

grace still asleep.

p.s. i feel that [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 1:42 am

i’m really really bad at reading signs and realizing opportunities and stuff like that. timing, i have lousy timing, and i feel that many thing pass me by because of it.

but today i went to the club to work out and i was going to start by lifting weights, but they were in the process of moving all the weight machines across the gym, so it was NOT POSSIBLE to actually use the machines. because they were moving them.

so intead of worrying about this or going in an empty room and doing some mind-numbingly boring lunges or squats, instead i just ran on the treadmill.

i missed bush’s speech tonight, but i heard a lot of talk about it during the day. and also ESPN was re-playing some Super Bowl from 10 or 20 years ago. SUPERBOWL FEVER! oh brother.

did i mention that brendan and jerri’s place is right across from the Staples Center? yeah, i did. but jerri told me that it sucks for people who are visiting them, because if there’s something going on at the staples center, and things go on a lot, the visitors have to pay 15 bucks for parking.

ah, one of the joys of LA.

thinking about going to LA makes me think about taking other trips. i haven’t been anywhere in a while, but the thought of going somewhere sure does make me want to go to other places, too.

maybe greece. there’s a cycling trip on one of the greek islands, but i think it costs a small fortune.

erica announced that she wants to go to Botswana this summer. i said i didn’t want to go with her. she would go and do good works, of course, because she’s good, erica. or she might go somewhere else.

erica doesn’t just sit around.

i want to go to the south of france.

but not right now. now i need to sleep, and quickly.

ok then,

grace still early wednesday morning.

WHAT HAPPENED TO TUESDAY, ANYWAY??? [ General ] - grace - grace@graceuncensored.com @ 1:34 am

yeah, it’s bad. i keep being ridiculously busy.

i haven’t started reading shape magazine, but at least i found it. i lost it for a while, but i’d left it at amy’s salon. so at least now i have it.

maybe i’ll just stay in bed all day tomorrow and read the magazine.

that would be really nice.

maybe i’ll do that on saturday, except by then i’ll only have SEVEN days to a better body, and the article is TEN days to a better body, so i’d be behind schedule, better-body wise.

christine and i were talking tonight, about boys, mostly, and i was congratulating her on doing something NOT stupid regarding a man. i said that we should really cherish these rare times when one of us does NOT do something that’s just a HORRIBLE idea and not in our best interests WHATSOEVER. since most of the time that’s all we do, we just make very very bad decisions. even though we’re always giving each other GREAT advice, but we’re both bad at actually listening to the advice and taking it.

rehearsal tonight was tiring. it felt like bad community theater. i know it’s going to come together, but right now it’s not so good. but i think we made some progress, but troy says i’m “very optimistic” and i wanted to say to him YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT REALLY GOES ON INSIDE MY HEAD, BUSTER," but i didn’t.

troy designed and built his home where we get to go for a cast party, so that should be interesting.

christine is going to la on thursday, and i told her to take pictures of the models in the elevators in jerri and brendan’s building. christine said that downtown LA is full of “transient” people; she described them as “exotic,” and one other descriptor that i can’t recall, but so there are models from all over the world, apparently.

i told her to tell the models that she wanted to take a photo for her friend’s website.

she didn’t seem nearly enthusiastic enough about this. she said YOU DO IT WHEN YOU GO THERE IN A COUPLE OF WEEKS.

but i want the photos NOW.

plus, of course, i don’t want to have to actually SPEAK to a person.

model or not.

but don’t models WANT to be on the internet?

i’m just saying.

damn, i’ve decided that maybe i’m just going to stay up all night long, because it’s 1:30 now, so ridiculous.

life is very different at the moment.

in a good way, pretty much, and it’s also different that the difference is good, instead of bad, which is how it usually is.

plus it’s supposed to be FIFTY on thursday.

ok ok ok,

very very early wednesday morning grace.

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